Welcome to another edition of FANTASY BOOKING where we discuss what we would do if we were given the power to control what happens when it comes to WWE Creative and the planning of events.
This time around, our task (as sponsored by a Pick Your Poison donation request through Patreon) is to try to rebook the infamous ECW December to Dismember 2006 pay-per-view. If we could go back in time and had full creative control, what matches would we put on that card to improve it and stop it from being one of the so-called worst events of all time?
The Rules:
1) You can only use performers who were available at the time. There is some flexibility with the Raw and SmackDown rosters, rather than just ECW, but you can't just say that you would have signed people from TNA or elsewhere and bring them into the company.
2) Wrestlers should be who the were in that era. You cannot have modern day All Mighty Bobby Lashley with MVP as he wasn't doing that gimmick in 2006.
3) Keep in mind time constraints. This shouldn't be a five hour event.
FANTASY BOOKING ECW DECEMBER TO DISMEMBER 2006 PPV
Note #1: I wasn't fully watching WWE at this point. I had started getting back into it, but I wasn't heavily dedicated. Therefore, I don't have much context on what feuds were going on at that point, how characters were received and all the intricacies that would lead to a much better lineup. Keep that in mind if I book something that seems absolutely absurd.
Note #2: I know this card is awful. I even tried to book an alternative card DURING the podcast, which you can hear on the episode.
Note #3: I wasn't able to dedicate as much time into this as I was hoping. Too many things going on in life right now taking me away from stuff almost 24/7. My apologies. However, this was still fun and I love doing these.
Note #4: ECW has never been my favorite brand. I never would have created the reboot if I was in creative control and I wasn't big on the company when it was in its heyday. Keep that in mind that I'm much more of a WWF/E guy than anything else and don't crucify me!
Shannon Moore vs. Matt Striker
For a short time frame, I was high on Shannon Moore and wanted him to reach at least Intercontinental Championship level. Eventually, my opinions leveled out more, but I had thought around this time frame and in 2007 that there was more potential to be tapped into.
I've always liked Matt Striker, and I still think he should have stuck around in WWE even as a commentator. I consider him underrated for that.
So here's what I propose for my intro match. Striker is new to the brand and he's got this obnoxious teacher gimmick. Moore is a rebellious youth and rebels against Striker's pseudo-authority.
In a sense, these are two newer ECW guys who the crowd is still trying to get to know in this space, but we want to remind everyone that this is a new form of ECW and not start out with just the originals. If that's the case, they'll crap all over it after they see something more extreme. But that's coming.
Moore gets the win. It's just a generic opener.
Extreme Rules Eight-Man Elimination Tag Team Match: ECW Originals (Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, Sabu and Stevie Richards) vs. New Breed (Elijah Burke, Sylvester Terkay, Doug and Danny Basham)
But hey, this is still ECW, right? So we don't want to go too long without reminding everyone of the violence that made the brand what it was.
I'm bumping up the New Breed idea in a sense. Some younger talent has been put on this brand and they're feeling like they need to take out the originals to make this THEIR ECW and not the way it used to be.
It's not as star-studded as it could be, but the New Breed is still learning its place and working out members. Burke is the clear leader. Terkay is his #2. The Bashams are Paul Heyman's stooges who he wants to initiate this change because Heyman's the ultimate heel in this scenario, turning his back on the originals.
I'm leaning more toward the ECW Originals winning this match so Burke can blame it on the Bashams not being good enough and looking to recruit others to the cause.
Great Khali Gauntlet
I've never been a big fan of The Great Khali. However, WWE wanted to push him and saw something else in him at this time. If that's the directive I've been given and I'm on the writing team, here's what I do.
Khali says (well, Daivari says on behalf of Khali) that he can run through anyone on the roster. To prove this correct, there's a gauntlet match. He'll take on a number of people who are the jobbers on the brand.
Basically, everyone else you have available is getting squashed. This means CW Anderson, Balls Mahoney, FBI's Little Guido and Tony Mamaluke, Danny Doring, Justin Credible and Roadkill. Substitute anyone else for anyone I'm missing on this lineup. Get rid of the ones that aren't available. It doesn't change the segment. Khali destroys people and it's over in a few minutes.
Mixed Tag Team Match: Mike Knox and Kelly Kelly vs. Kevin Thorn and Ariel
Basically what we got, except I'd lean more heavily into the T&A elements, since that's what the ECW crowd wants and that's socially acceptable at the time.
Rene Dupree vs. Al Snow
It seems Al Snow was a jobber at this point. Since Dupree was in a position where they wanted to make him something of some sort, how about we have a generic match where he beats Snow? Ideally, I'd rather Snow beat him, but apparently, Snow leaves in January, so that was likely in the works and you don't have people go on winning sprees when they're leaving the company.
ECW Championship Elimination Chamber Match: Big Show (c) vs. Bobby Lashley vs. CM Punk vs. Hardcore Holly vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Test
What? You're going with the same damn thing? Yeah. Fundamentally, those are the biggest names you can put in the match. It makes the most sense, especially with this idea of Sabu being in the other Extreme Rules contest.
It seems as though most people were upset with a multitude of things here in that Sabu was put in and then taken out of the match, replaced with Holly, RVD or Punk didn't win, etc. I think if you book the same match but you're honest about the Holly inclusion (rather than a switcheroo) and you simply give the title to Punk or RVD instead of Lashley, then people wouldn't hate it as much.
Benefit of hindsight. Although, to be honest, there's part of me that probably would have booked Lashley to win this if I had been on Creative at the time, just the same. I've always viewed the ECW Championship within WWE as a sort of test run for one of the true world titles and Lashley was a guy I wouldn't have trusted with heading up Raw or SmackDown then.
It's a shame Kurt Angle isn't around to be involved, or that there isn't a strong enough roster to poach more from Raw or SmackDown without neutering either of those brands.
HOW WOULD YOU BOOK YOUR CARD?
LEAVE YOUR THOUGHTS IN THE COMMENTS BELOW!
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