Superstar Stock Market: Damien Sandow-n The Drain? | Smark Out Moment

Superstar Stock Market: Damien Sandow-n The Drain?

Posted by Callum Wiggins Thursday, August 7, 2014
WWE roster power rankings wrestlers worth Welcome to the inaugural installment of SUPERSTAR STOCK MARKET, where your friends at Smark Out Moment offer their years of expertise to discern how current WWE superstars are trending. Based on detailed analysis of their championship aspirations, gimmick potential, win/loss record and recent performances, we will offer specialist analysis on which superstars are worthy of investing time in, and which will have their backers in the midst of a Great Depression.

This edition is devoted to Damien Sandow. Formerly depicted as the haughty "Intellectual Saviour of the Masses", presently he can be regularly seen dressed as famed characters from history and popular culture to undermine his opponents and the WWE Universe.

Value at end of previous year (12/31/2013) 

Damien Sandow appeared as the next big thing in the middle of 2013, with many buying stock in him in July for his Money in the Bank victory. The briefcase appeared to guarantee a future run with the World Heavyweight Championship like its previous holders. Though he suffered a number of losses against the likes of Cody Rhodes, Sheamus and Santino Marella, the contract kept his stock value at a consistently high value.

However, his valuation suffered a significant decline when he failed to defeat John Cena for the championship, becoming the first man to fail at cashing in outright (Cena had previously failed, but his loss was by DQ, so he technically won the match). Thus, his losing streak and run with the briefcase had proven an unnecessary venture. Moreover, the transition to a sole world champion by the year's end left his chances of receiving another opportunity at an all-time low.

By the year's end, his inimitable gimmick of a flamboyant and contemptuous intellectual was gradually made more generic. He stopped performing cartwheels, ditched his pink ring attire for a plain black affair, and discontinued his luxurious blue robe. The only element that continued was his 'You're Welcome' catchphrase. Furthermore, the emergence of Adrian English on NXT appeared to steal some of Sandow's distinctiveness, and sent some of his prior investors towards the new prospect. However, he concluded 2013 with a championship opportunity, as he lost to Big E Langston for the Intercontinental Championship at the TLC PPV, which indicated his position in the midcard was not yet in jeopardy. 

2014 Win/Loss Record

Wins – 3
Losses – 33
Draws – 0

PPV Appearances

Royal Rumble
Loss (Royal Rumble)
Elimination Chamber
No match
Loss (Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal)
Extreme Rules
No match
No match
Money in the Bank
Loss (vs Adam Rose)
Loss (Intercontinental Title Battle Royal)

Gimmick Potential

Prior to 2014, Sandow's smarmy intellectual gimmick was certainly garnering him sufficient heat and excellent reviews. Whilst it was not entirely original (Christopher Nowinski, The Genius) it had a proven track record amongst heels. Additionally, Sandow's natural charisma, humour and grandiosity afforded him an individuality that could carry him up the card as either a wrestler or manager.

Nevertheless, since the turn of the year Sandow's current gimmick has been dressing as figures of popular culture or from history and adopting their personas during promos and in matches. This has had similar incarnations, with The Big Show and Charlie Haas utilising a comparable gimmick, copying other wrestlers' looks and movesets. Strangely enough, it hasn't been blessed with a great deal of tangible success. Though he still carries himself as an intellectual superior, he has become something of a performing monkey, and thus hard to be taken seriously as a championship competitor.

Championship Aspirations

Since losing a shot at the Intercontinental Championship against Big E Langston at TLC 2013, his chances of winning any gold have been virtually non-existent. The closest he has come is in Battle Royal's for both midcard championship, and this appears his best chance, as in singles action his form has been pathetic. In terms of hopes for a world championship in the near future, you would have more chance of witnessing him pulling the Holy Grail from his luxuriant beard.

Highest Peak – 14th July 2013 (Money in the Bank)

Sandow defeated six other men, most notably his former tag team partner Cody Rhodes, to win the Money in the Bank briefcase. In previous year's, this victory had been a launching pad for future world champions, and seen almost as valuable as a Royal Rumble victory. This left Sandow as a superstar certainly worth investing in, as no matter his wins or losses from this point onwards, he was virtually guaranteed to become World Champion in the next twelve months.

Lowest Valley – 14th July 2014 (RAW)

On the date that would have been the expiration of his Money in the Bank contract, Sandow was not a world champion. He wasn't even competing. Instead, within one year he had been reduced to featuring in a hopelessly unfunny backstage skit with Adam Rose advertising Sonic fast food. Wearing their uniform and a pair of roller skates, the pair were involved in the shameless promotion which left Sandow as the butt of the attempt at a joke. His stock value hit an all-time low as he became the heir-apparent to the departing Santino Marella in the field of "comic relief". On the bright side, at least Marella won a title every now and again.

Unbeaten in singles matches for six months
Loses three consecutive Tag Team Championship Matches
"Martyred" by DX at RAW 1000
Fails to cash-in Money in the Bank
Cross Rhodes Tag Team
First man eliminated in Royal Rumble
Wins Money in the Bank briefcase
Knocked out numerous weeks by the Big Show

Beaten up by Sergeant Slaughter

Beaten up by Hugh Jackman

Beaten up by Bret Hart

Sonic Advert


• Promo Skills
• Comedy Value
• Unique Look
• Relatively Young
• Competent Ring Skills


• Gimmick (or lack thereof)
• Lack of credibility/losing streak
• Becoming more generic

Stock Advisement - SELL, SELL, SELL 

The future in the stock of Damien Sandow looks to be declining week after week, to the point where one would have to pay somebody to take it off their hands. Whilst there is argument to suggest that his value can only go up from Sonic, his current losing streak and failure to escape a comedic role means his stock is unlikely to increase in value. Sandow will however retain some value for consistent appearances on RAW and SmackDown due to the McMahon infatuation with comedy segments.

Nevertheless, the negatives highly outweigh the positives at this juncture. Therefore the financial advice is to sell immediately in order to recoup any of the investment in Sandow, and instead place it in a more promising venture. If you actually have the sort of brain power Sandow claims Americans do, then hold on and hope for a miracle.

Superstar Stock Market buried sell

Chances of Stock Rising – 8%


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Callum Wiggins hails from Essex in the United Kingdom. He recently graduated from the University of York with a degree in History and has been a fan of professional wrestling since 2002. Outside of wrestling, he is also a fan of Arsenal FC and enjoys video games, darts, and Formula One. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Google+.


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