|WWE Extreme Rules 2014 Results|
Who will win? When the time comes, check out the live coverage of the 2014 Extreme Rules pay-per-view with results and review here.
You can check out my predictions here with the spoilers of all these matches and more.
Our panel for this evening consists of Sheamus, Alex Riley, and Booker T along with Josh Mathews, per usual. There's a CM Punk chant going around.
Pre-Show WeeLC Match: El Torito vs. Hornswoggle
Micro Cole, WeeBL, and the Mini-King Lawler are special commentators and there's a little person as the announcer as well as the referee. Good God. Hornswoggle is unable to jump over the rope to do a suicide dive. El Torito find a mini chair. He uses it to boost himself up and do a Bronco Buster. LOL Micro Cole threw out a "vintage El Torito". The fans start chanting "we want tables". Hornswoggle introduces a mini ladder, but then asks for a slightly bigger one, which is still smaller than a normal one. Hornswoggle places El Torito on the miniature announcer's table and jumps from the ring apron onto him. The fans start chanting "this is awesome". Hornswoggle accidentally hits Heath Slater with a chair and Slater falls backward into a table. Jinder Mahal, Los Matadores and El Torito all fly backward onto a pile of ladders and tables. That's actually one of the bigger spots of the year! LMAO. Drew McIntyre launches himself onto a table. El Torito is able to jump on top of Hornswoggle through a table with a West Coast Pop and get the victory.
WINNER: El Torito via pinfall.
Wow. I'll give them a little bit of credit.
Lilian Garcia jumped the gun and started to announce something, but they're doing another discussion with the panel and cut her off. The fans boo.
Triple Threat Elimination Match: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Jack Swagger
Jack Swagger needs a new tag team partner, if not just so he can keep his theme song and "we the people" phrase, which are awesome and over with the crowd (a lot more than he is). Likewise, Cesaro needs a new theme song and RVD needs a new catch phrase. Paul Heyman says his politically incorrect opinion is that WWE only gets it right one night a year, when they go extreme. "The 11th commandment of the extreme is thou shalt not boo Paul Heyman. Thou shalt worship the new Paul Heyman guy, the Swiss Superman and the new King of Extreme, Cesaro." RVD controls the pace of the match at first. Cesaro swings Swagger and is caught by RVD's foot afterward. If I heard that correctly, it seems like he had to ask Cesaro if he was okay. Swagger jumps to the top rope and tosses RVD to the ground, putting him quickly into the Patriot Lock. Cesaro for some reason breaks it up (stupid to do in an elimination match), but he does so in a cool way by doing a springboard uppercut. Cesaro hits his vertical suplex from the outside spot and RVD follows it up immediately with a Five Star Frog Splash on Swagger, eliminating him. For some reason, the commentators are confused about whether or not he was eliminated, even though Swagger never kicked out. We're down to RVD vs Cesaro. Cesaro hits a German suplex for a 2-count. A trash can is introduced after RVD gets some of his spots in. He gets a few more in—standard RVD. RVD misses a Frog Splash and Cesaro follows that up with a Neutralizer on the trash can for the victory.
WINNER: Cesaro via pinfall.
Better than I expected it to be. I liked this match.
Backstage, Daniel Bryan is being checked out. Stephanie McMahon shows up to apologize and say she can't control Kane. She says she's worried about his health and advises him to surrender the title. He tells her to get out of his face. He's walking in AND out of the match with the title. Steph says he'll be walking out like Kane's bitch instead.
Time for a Bo Dallas promo. You just have to Bolieve...even when it comes to getting pregnant. Yup, a pregnancy test was on this one. These are hilarious.
Handicap Match: Alexander Rusev vs. R-Truth & Xavier Woods
Lana takes her sweet time strutting around, spinning so people can get a good look at her body. They are dedicating this match to Vladimir Putin, the president of Russia. This evokes a USA chant. Out comes Mr. Potato Head himself, Alexander Rusev, to nowhere near the reaction that Lana gets. R-Truth says there's no time to rap and dedicates this match to America. Before the match even starts, Rusev nails Woods with a kick and starts beating the hell out of both of them. The match does officially start when R-Truth gets back to his feet. The fans start chanting "we want Lana" and cheer when the camera switches over to her. Rusev continues to destroy R-Truth while Xavier Woods stays completely out of the action. Standard Rusev squash that ends with him putting the Accolade on Truth.
WINNER: Alexander Rusev via submission.
As uninteresting as I thought it would be. A total reversal of the previous match. Way to make Xavier Woods look like a chump.
Backstage, Evolution is being interviewed by Renee Young. Triple H says their massive egos are well deserved.
Intercontinental Championship: Big E (c) vs. Bad News Barrett
Big pop for Bad News Barrett! He's got some bad news for us: very soon, everyone here will be struck down with the new virus going around. But that is going to be nothing compared to what Big E will feel when he loses the title tonight. Big E hits a nice spear through the ropes on Barrett. BNB hits the Winds of Change for a 2-count. Wasteland for a 2-count. Big E escapes being hit with a Bullhammer. Splash from Big E. The straps go down, which signify that he's setting up for the Big Ending. Barrett escapes and hits the Bullhammer for the win.
WINNER (and new Intercontinental champion): Bad News Barrett via pinfall.
This is good news to me! I like Big E, but he's been stagnant as the champion and Bad News Barrett could potentially do more with it.
Evolution (Triple H, Randy Orton & Batista) vs. The Shield (Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose & Seth Rollins)
The Shield get an early advantage. "That was justice", the fans chant. Rollins starts it off against Triple H and gets a nice suicide dive on him. Triple H evens it up with a clothesline and tags in Batista, who receives a flood of boos from the crowd. Rollins takes a lot of punishment from Evolution. Rollins is able to tag Ambrose in and the momentum shifts back to The Shield. Ambrose locks in a Figure Four on Orton, but it's broken up. Bootista chant breaks out. Roman Reigns hasn't been doing all that much so far. Ambrose escapes an attempt at a Pedigree and plants HHH with a DDT. There's a huge pop for Roman Reigns when he gets tagged in and goes nuts, hitting clotheslines and Superman punches and everything else to everyone in his path. He nails Batista with that apron kick and immediately follows it up by taking Triple H and Orton out of the equation as well. Batista goes for a Batista Bomb, but Seth Rollins interrupts. Superman punch onto Batista. The Shield pick up Batista and give him a Triple Powerbomb. Orton and Triple H break up the pin by dragging Reigns out of the ring. Rollins misses a leap onto the outside. Triple H hits a Pedigree on Reigns and tries to drag Batista onto him, but Ambrose breaks it up. Batista goes for the pin, but Reigns kicks out. Orton hits an RKO on Reigns. Batista goes for the pin, but Rollins breaks it up! Rollins and Orton fight on the outside, as Ambrose and Triple H were doing before. Reigns and Batista are in the ring, down and out. Ambrose runs along the commentary tables and takes out both Orton and Triple H. The quartet battle throughout the crowd while Batista and Reigns are still in the ring, getting back onto their feet. I wonder if Ambrose is having flashbacks to CZW. Rollins jumps from part of the stands onto all three of the others! Batista hits a Spinebuster on Reigns. Reigns hits a Superman punch and gears himself up for a spear. He hits one on Batista and gets the victory!
WINNERS: The Shield via pinfall.
Very good match and definitely the best one so far. Lots of great action throughout, with a slow enough start that it could build from start to finish logically.
Steel Cage Match: John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt
I hope I'm wrong, but I have a feeling that this is going to be disappointing. Interference is definitely playing a part, which means there's no clean victory coming for Wyatt. Wyatt acts as the conductor for the audience to sing "he's got the whole world in his hands". Maestro is not a role that suits someone that looks like that. Cena climbs over the cage, but Wyatt brings him back in. Cause, you know, John Cena is a guy that never backs down from a fight, but is too scared to drop in front of Luke Harper and Erick Rowan. Wyatt does his backwards walk to the door, which in theory seems cool but makes no sense if he were trying to actually win the match. Cena is about to escape the cage and Rowan blocks him. Mind you, he doesn't lock it, so Cena just has to push it open, which he could easily do, but now Harper helps Rowan out. Cena almost overpowers both of them, but Wyatt interferes. Cena climbs the cage and Rowan forces him back into the ring. Harper is taken out of commission, as is Wyatt. Rowan stands ready to nail Cena with a chair if he escapes the cage, so Cena backs down and goes back into the ring instead. Cena reverses a Sister Abigail attempt into an STF. Wyatt crawls to the door and is able to break out of the STF. Rowan tries to pull Wyatt out while Cena tries to pull him back in. Cena wins the tug of war. Cena hits an Attitude Adjustment from the top. Harper will break up the pin. And he does. As Cena is about to win, the lights go out. They come back on and a kid is in front of him with a microphone, singing "he's got the whole world in his hands" with a voice modulator making him sound creepy. Cena is freaked out and steps into a Sister Abigail. Wyatt escapes the cage for the victory.
WINNER: Bray Wyatt via escaping through the door
Typical John Cena match, where he beats all of the odds and makes the heel look like he can't do anything right by himself, and then at the end, one stupid little thing causes a screwy finish where Cena still looks strong.
Divas Championship: Paige (c) vs. Tamina Snuka
Hey, look. Paige apparently can look like a babyface by acknowledging the fans. Could've fooled me, the way things have gone down the past month. Not much is going on of note. Paige goes for a hurricanrana, but Tamina slams her into the barricade. Later on, Paige puts Tamina in the "modified Scorpion Cross Lock" (which really needs an actual name) and makes Tamina tap out.
WINNER: Paige via submission.
It's time for a Wyatt Family promo. Little Johnny is there with Harper, Rowan and Wyatt. The kid puts on a sheep mask and says "follow the buzzards" (but the voice modulator isn't ready for him at first, and he gets 'follow' out in his normal voice, haha. Hey, it happens.)
WWE World Heavyweight Championship: Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Kane
Daniel Bryan takes the fight to Kane early on. His neck isn't being much of a factor. Kane introduces a chair while Bryan brings a kendo stick into play. They pay homage to the beat down from Raw with the steel steps, but Bryan is able to escape a tombstone on them. Someone in the crowd chastises Kane for having fake hair...multiple times. Bryan and Kane battle to the stage, where Kane throws Bryan into part of it and WWE turns the lights off, trying to claim that the force of the impact did that (so lame). For some reason, Kane throws a TV into some ice water, nowhere near Bryan from what I could see, as they battle in the backstage area. Bryan hits Kane with a snow shovel (wait...why do they have that if it isn't snowing..and does that imply that they use handheld snow shovels to clear out the arena if it does? LOL). Kane throws Bryan onto a car and smashes two windows (the latter on a different car). Bryan hits Kane with what I believe was a tire iron or crowbar...I can't quite tell from the angle. Since this isn't a Falls Count Anywhere match, Bryan has to drag him back into the ring. He puts him on a forklift and nails him again with the tire iron. Using the forklift, Bryan starts driving Kane back to the ring, while Lawler suggests that he should run him into a wall or another car (haha). Bryan dumps Kane over the top rope into the ring. Bryan then climbs the forklift and does some Yes chants before jumping and hitting a headbutt. Kane kicks out. There's a botched chokeslam attempt, followed up by an actual chokeslam for a 2-count. Kane preps a tombstone on a steel chair, but Bryan counters into a DDT onto it instead for a 2-count. Bryan is thrown through the commentary table. Kane sets up a normal Dudley Boys-style table (we can call it that by this point, right?) and pours gasoline over it, then sets it on fire. This backfires (see what I did there?) on Kane and Bryan forces HIM to go through the table, instead. Kane is quickly doused with fire extinguishers and hit with a Knee Plus.
WINNER: Daniel Bryan via pinfall.
Some decent spots in an otherwise kind of bland match.
1. Evolution vs. The Shield
2. WeeLC spots
3. Several spots in the main event
1. John Cena vs Bray Wyatt
2. Paige vs. Tamina Snuka
3. Alexander Rusev squash
Reasoning: There were some things that definitely could have been better, like the Low Blows mentioned above. Other than that, though, the rest was either good or great. Some things exceeded my expectations, like the RVD match and the WeeLC match, and others were as good as I was realistically hoping they would be. Entertaining.
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