|TNA Slammiversary 2013 PPV Live Coverage|
Who is going to win?
PREDICTIONS: As always, I'm going into this blind without following Impact religiously. I fully expect Bully Ray to retain the TNA Championship. Chavo and Hernandez will probably drop the tag team title. Taryn could very well beat Gail Kim but I don't think she necessarily will. Sam Shaw is a random guess for the win. I sincerely hope Joseph Park doesn't become the TV Champion. Kenny King will retain, I guess.
X Division Championship [Ultimate X Match]: Kenny King (c) vs. Suicide vs. Chris Sabin
Sorry guys, I jumped into this match at least halfway through due to other things I was doing. It sounds like it was good so far, so I'm going to have to check it out afterward and then write up a review on it more in-depth.
WINNER (and new X Division Champion): Chris Sabin via taking down the title
As I said, I can't review the majority of this match, which is a shame as I was looking forward to this as one of the only matches that could be good. I hope I'm proven wrong.
Before Sabin leaves, Hulk Hogan comes out to congratulate him. He says that at Destination X in the summer, the X Division champion still gets a shot at the TNA Championship. The Aces and Eights members that are in the six man tag match come out. I guess that match is next and they'll attack Hogan who will be saved by Magnus, Joe and Hardy. Hogan says the people in Boston aren't afraid of no ghosts (lmao...what?), nor terrorists, nor "3 pussies in leather" and gives Anderson the middle finger. He then says he'll bitchslap Bischoff's ass and says Eric Bischoff is a bitch too. He calls Sting the greatest wrestler in the business (...nah).
They introduce the six man tag and they're acting surprised that Jeff Hardy is there, despite announcing it ahead of time. Maybe they're just shocked he showed up.
Six Man Tag: Aces & Eights (Mr. Anderson, Wes Brisco & Garett Bischoff) vs. Jeff Hardy, Samoa Joe & Magnus
Aces and Eights attack Hardy while he's posing. Nothing to really talk about so far. Brisco acted like it hurt HIM to kick Magnus in the back, though. That was pretty stupid. Hardy hits Whisper in the Wind on Brisco but it gets broken up and now we're doing the normal "everyone in the ring" deal. Bischoff knocks Hardy down when he's about to attempt a Swanton Bomb. Everyone then stalls, waiting for something to happen. Oh, ok, it was supposed to be Joe attacking him and then Magnus hitting an elbow. Hardy hits a Swanton on Brisco this time and they get the win.
WINNERS: Jeff Hardy, Samoa Joe, and Magnus via pinfall.
Not too surprising. Hardy is the purpose of this match more so than anything else and this will give people the idea that Aces and Eights might lose everything. Then, Bully Ray will retain.
Joseph Park cuts some "jokes" about a Boston Crab and then gets jumped from behind by Devon and Mike Knox.
TNA Gutcheck Finals (winner receives a spot in the Bound for Glory Series): Jay Bradley vs. Sam Shaw
Sam Shaw's music sounds like it was made in the 80s. Virtually nothing happening. Feels like an independent wrestling match. Bradley picks up the win.
WINNER: Jay Bradley via pinfall.
After the match, Christy Hemme asks how it feels to make it into the Bound for Glory Series. He says he's the first in and he'll be the last out. Nah.
JB talks to Aries and Roode. "Gunner is no Bobby Roode." I agree, Bobby. I agree.
TNA Television Championship: Devon (c) vs. Joseph Park
Park isn't coming out, due to the attack. I guess Abyss will come out instead. Devon tells the ref to ring the bell, count to ten, and if he doesn't come out, to declare him the winner. This happens.
WINNER: Devon via forfeit.
Obviously, Abyss is coming out.
Devon then starts talking about Abyss. There we go. 5...4..3..2...1. And now Abyss comes out to replace him.
TNA Television Championship: Devon (c) vs. Abyss
You know how this will go. This will be relatively fast with Devon getting a bit of offense and then Abyss will win the title. Yup. Abyss will win in the next minute or two. And there we go, Black Hole Slam.
WINNER (and new Television Champion): Abyss via pinfall.
Well, I did expect Joseph Park to win instead, but I guess that counts, right?
Dixie Carter comes out to announce the next TNA Hall of Fame member. Her theme song really says she hears voices? Are these the only things that are telling her that her ideas are good? Maybe that's who she is talking to when she tweets that she has big surprises that go nowhere. LMAO, the fans are chanting "you can't wrestle" to her.
Who is the next inductee? Kurt Angle. Makes sense.
TNA Tag Team Championship: Chavo Guerrero & Hernandez (c) vs. Bad Influence vs. Bobby Roode & Austin Aries vs. James Storm & Gunner
I'm expecting The Spirit of Eddie Guerrero to come out on top here if Storm and Gunner don't. Good, exciting, fast-paced match so far. Even Gunner hasn't looked bad. No eliminations yet. Hernandez gives Aries a Border Toss and Chavo hits him with a frog splash. Daniels gets caught using a title belt, so they are disqualified. Aries rolls up Chavo Guerrero and eliminates them, meaning we'll be getting a new set of tag champs. Gunner makes Aries submit with the Gun Rack.
WINNERS (and new tag team champions): James Storm and Gunner via submission.
Seems like they're set on pushing Gunner. I hope this works out for them. He didn't look too bad in this match, I'll give him credit. Good match.
Last Knockout Standing Match: Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell
So ODB replaces Taryn as the referee for the Knockouts division? Isn't she the tag team champion? Gail picks up a chair and Taryn simply kicks it out of the way. That was a little weird. Ok, they follow it up later on with Taryn giving a good crossbody from the top rope onto Gail who was holding the chair, so it hurt both of them. That makes sense and was done well. Gail puts Taryn in that ring post Figure 4 spot. I used to love that back in the day. I miss that. Gail Kim goes to spear Taryn in the corner but runs into a chair instead. Not bad, not bad at all. Taryn now puts Gail in the same Figure 4 spot for payback. Taryn smacks the ramp in an attempt to ram into Gail. Nice thud on that one. Gail sets up a piledriver on the ramp. Instead, something random happens. I don't know if that was Taryn giving a bulldog to Gail, Gail doing something to Taryn, but whatever happens, they both land on the floor from the ramp. Taryn beats the 10-count but Gail doesn't.
WINNER: Taryn Terrell via a bulldog.
Good match overall.
AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle
Not excited about this at all, personally. New theme for AJ. Sounds like Aces and Eights almost. Get ready for lots of finishers being kicked out of and really nothing more, while the fans chant "this is awesome" and either the ref gets bumped or Angle bleeds. Angle Slams and 450 Splashes and ankle locks and everything. Blah blah blah. Kurt Angle basically just pins Styles out of nowhere for the win. That was weird.
WINNER: Kurt Angle via pinfall.
Bully Ray says he's going to give Sting a piledriver. It's sad that I'm now excited about this. I miss that move.
TNA World Heavyweight Championship [No Holds Barred]: Bully Ray (c) vs. Sting
He...is the current-ah, reigning-ah, and defending-ah....TNA Heavyweight Champion of the World and damn sure better win this match, Bully Ray. And his opponent, wearing a shirt like a fat kid at a public pool, from 5 and a half feet under due to his age, Heath Ledger! Typical hardcore match so far. Lots of ring step and chair action. Brooke Hogan comes out to stand there and do nothing. Sting tells her to go away. She does. Bully Ray capitalizes by low-blowing Sting. Bully Ray hits a piledriver and nobody acts like they even care. And then Sting kicks out. Seriously? What the fuck was the point in that? Come on, TNA! Bully Ray bringing out a table gets a bigger pop from the crowd. Ray power bombs Sting through the table, but he kicks out. Ray then gets a switchblade knife?! WTF. He is now cutting the ring apart and exposing the wooden base underneath the padding. He hits another piledriver! Now there we fucking go! And Sting kicks out? Ok, I didn't expect it, but come on, that's ridiculous, that should have won the match. Sting hits a Scorpion Death Drop on the wooden part and is about to win until Aces and Eights comes out. Typical "heel can't possibly win" stuff. I hate that. Just because they're the bad guys doesn't mean they have to immediately become not as tough. And Sting is able to beat up all of the other members by himself and be standing before Bully Ray. Devon tosses a chain into the ring but Sting gets it and hits Ray with it instead. Devon stops the ref from counting the pinfall victory for Sting. Bully Ray then has the hammer and hits Sting with it.
WINNER: Bully Ray via pinfall.
That was handled so stupidly.
1. Tag Team Championship match
2. Last Knockout Standing
3. Thank God Joseph Park didn't win the TV title
1. Bully Ray is made to look like crap; so is the piledriver
2. Six Man Tag
3. Gutcheck Finals
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